If doctors make so much money, why can't they afford new magazines for their
waiting rooms?  

Judging from television commercials, there's a hemorrhoid epidemic in this
country.

A good many years ago, before the widespread use of ultrasound to determine
an unborn child's sex, 3 pregnant women were sitting in their doctor's
waiting room.
        "I'm going to have a boy," said one of the women.
        "How do you know that?" asked another.
        "Everyone knows that when the man is on top during conception,
you'll have a boy."
        "Oh," said the first woman.  "I guess that means I'll be having a
girl, because I was on top during conception."
        The third woman burst into tears.
        "What's wrong, honey?" asked the first woman.
        Between sobs, the third woman said, "I'm going to have puppies."