Q: When should you use a condom?
A: On every conceivable occasion.

Q: What do a condom and a coffin have in common?
A: They're both filled with a stiff, only one's coming and the other is
   going.

Q: What is the definiton of eternity?
A: The length of time between when you come and she leaves.

Q: What do you call a female clone?
A: A clunt.

Q: Is fellatio necessary for perfect sex?
A: No, but it gives you a head start.

Q: Why is a cock nicer than a man?
A: It always stands up when a women enters the room.

Q: What's Bigamy?
A: The same as Monogamy-----one wife too many.